Shock and Awe
Shock. It stops you in your tracks. It's something crazy about the stress that it brings. Stress is ridiculous as it can worsen pre-existing issues and it has the ability to cause new ones when you welcome it. Sometimes you don't conscientiously invite it in, but shock breaks in armed and ready with stress.
Yesterday, I was adulting doing something for a client then on my way to rehearsal. I looked at this text message I had been dreading to read for another reason but received news that literally stopped me in my tracks. Suddenly I was burning up, on blue fire with the heat turned off in my car at the moment. I frantically removed my coat as if my life depended on it and reached for my chest that was beating so forcefully and not because of increased heart rate or any of my health concerns. Shock had set in and stress slammed into my brain breaking in and I, a victor, became a victim. I found it difficult to put my car in reverse to back out of the parking lot to make it to rehearsal on time. Here it is I had just went into shock, my body was operating in auto pilot and I had to walk into church as if I was not panicking because I had to be in ministry mode because I am an example whether I like it or not. I'm personally not a very emotional person so now I am dealing with the shock of this news and the shock of feeling actually feeling but I had no idea what this foreign concept was. After rehearsal, I drove home in auto pilot once again. It had to be Jesus himself who kept me because I was barely able to adjust the volume on the radio which was playing Chrisette Michele's Milestone album and the songs were appropriate and inappropriate for the moment simultaneously. Maybe Blues would have been more befitting in hindsight...
Because I tend not to share too much, I'll spare all of the details and go straight to the lesson. I failed, miserably. I allowed shock to break me down and steal away my focus. My concentration was lost. I was unable to work as I had planned because I was in shock. I was "stressed out" as I hear the song by by A Tribe Called Quest ft. Faith Evans. I was broke down in that moment. That one moment I allowed to steal moments. I forgot to cast all my anxiety on Him because He cares for me. I lost sight of being more than a conqueror. I forgot that even when I am weak He is strong. My mind was at a loss. I lost to shock. Don't allow shock to play mind games and attack your body. "Expect the unexpected" is what they say. Often times what shocks us the most is what we already expected... Be watchful and stay guarded. Don't lose to shock. Don't welcome stress into your life or it will eat you alive. Inhale. Exhale. I hear the words repeatedly. Inhale. Exhale. It will be okay. Inhale. Exhale. There is work to be done, and you cannot work while having a pity party. Inhale. Exhale. It is time to come back to life. Inhale. Exhale.
Be blessed. Love.